Wednesday, May 27, 2009

All Non-Tattoo NBA team

In watching the NBA playoffs, I feel like I've qualified for a minor in Art History. There are -- what? -- about eight players in the NBA without limbs full of body art? I don't mean just a little eagle on the forearm, but I'm talking about a whole mural.

Take a look at tonight or any night of the rest of the playoffs. The Denver Nuggets got more art on their arms than the Louvre. Kenyon Martin alone has History of the World, Part I on just his neck and right arm. Chris Andersen, pictured here, looks like alien life from another solar system.

I'm not a fuddy-duddy, althought I realize by just writing "fuddy-duddy" that probably makes me one. If you're part of the NBA hip-hop crowd, and you want a tatto on your arm, knock yourself out. But let's be honest. Most of this "body art" is beyond ridiculous. Better you than me, Chris, because when I'm 60, I don't want to be walking down the street looking more like an idiot than you do now.

Still, it gives me great pleasure to say the entire professional basketball world does not look like they just got inked up at a Harley rally in Sturgis. There's some actual pretty good players whose skin seems pretty clear to me. Here's one man's All Non-Tattoo NBA team:

Guard: Steve Nash, Phoenix Suns.
Guard: Tony Parker, San Antonio Spurs.
Forward: Dirk Nowitzki, Dallas Mavericks.
Forward: Pau Gasol, Los Angeles Lakers.
Center: Yao Ming, Houston Rockets.

I'd go to battle with that clean team.

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